Sometimes I get a woe is me attitude like, how are we going to be able to buy a van, take kids to Disneyland, buy a house all when we just started our career and the kids are coming every 2 years and they are expensive? I am SO happy we did it this way, and if we weren't able to do these things for our children, they would be fine, they would survive, and we would be happy. But somehow, we did it. And not somehow, by the hand of the Lord, we did it all. And then something comes along, a co-worker giving Juan a set of bunk beds, for free! And not just any set, a sturdy $800+ set with a trundle bed and mattresses and boom, we now could easily have 5 kids in this 3-bedroom home and again I am just humbled beyond belief. We are blessed. Heavenly Father knows our family. He knows my every desire, my every petty "want", and my absolute grateful heart. Every day I walk through the upstairs of our home, with the sun shining into the playroom and spilling down over the loft to the stairs and I think, "This is it. This is all I ever wanted." And then the van with automatic doors and a dvd player and it's 12 years old with plenty of flaws that makes me love it even more. We got a van. And we took the kids to Disney!!! What? I can't even believe that happened. Juan and I work SO hard for our family and Juan makes these relationships at work with people where they love him and they want him to succeed and then Bill, he gives us everything. Our train table. Endless amounts of clothes and coats. And now the beds. I just feel so happy and so watched over. I know my Heavenly Father loves me.
Today we were sitting in Primary and I have recently had the best experience with primary. I am 1st counselor and after months of feeling stressed and sick each time a Sunday came around, Heavenly Father listened to my prayers and I listened and I made a special effort to talk to the kids before church and get to know them and show them how happy I was to see them. And suddenly that sick feeling has gone away and primary each week is a lot of work, and it is loud and chaotic, but I feel so good about it. And the Spirit testifies to me each week how much Heavenly Father loves those children, and that I am there to respresent His love. That is so important that I remember my role and that I am a servant of the Lord.
We are learning this song in primary right now and every time Jen Cav played the music and the children sang, the Spirit flooded the room. There is not doubt in my mind, I know these words are true:
1. A long time ago in a beautiful place,
Children were gathered ’round Jesus.
He blessed and taught as they felt of His love.
Each saw the tears on His face.
The love that He felt for His little ones
I know He feels for me.
I did not touch Him or sit on His knee,
Yet, Jesus is real to me.
2. Now I am here in a beautiful place,
Learning the teachings of Jesus.
Parents and teachers will help guide the way,
Lighting my path ev’ry day.
Wrapped in the arms of my Savior’s love,
I feel His gentle touch.
Living each day, I will follow His way,
Home to my Father above.
I know He lives!
I will follow faithfully.
My heart I give to Him.
I know that my Savior loves me.
I know that my Savior loves me
Cami, thank you for posting this. It is absolutely the way we all need to feel each and every day. We are being watched over by a LOVING God. He wants us to have our "wants".
ReplyDeleteI love being in primary too. I'm also the 1st counselor. The kids are amazing! Such pure love and pure testimonies. They truly believe that the answer to everything is Jesus Christ. I believe that too. I would laugh at them always answering the same, but they know what's going on!
Yes Cami! Thank you for sharing this. I truly believe that Primary is the most spiritual room in the whole church on Sundays. What is more special than helping to build our children's testimonies of Jesus Christ? I love the song they are learning this month too and I have them repeat the chorus over and over showing me how it makes them feel! I absolutely love it!
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful friend Juan has to give you bunk beds! It just shows how Heavenly Father puts people in our lives to help us so that His plan for us is possible! I bet the girls are loving it.
Thank you for expressing your feelings and testimony. It is
ReplyDeletewonderful to see all of you kids learn from the Spirit and go through the same things Mom & I went through. Never forget these testimony moments when trials come, they will carry you through the tough times. We love to hear your experiences.
Thank you all for your testimonies. You all express yourselves so well. A couple of things Cami said really hit home: "Heavenly Father knows our family. He knows my every desire, my every petty "want" and my absolute grateful heart." I know my Heavenly Father and my Savior love me. They are real and I love feeling their arms around me. I have had a rough 7 months. I can't explain the things I've gone through. But right now I'm getting some relief--less anxiety--which I am so very grateful for. Heavenly Father cares about me, Ann Stokes, and through the atonement of our Savior, I am being healed. They care about me and every one of my needs. I thank all of you, my dear, dear family for your prayers and love. You help uplift me each day. I love you all. I'm so grateful for such a wonderful husband who has helped me every inch of the way and given me blessings and cares about me and can even get me to laugh again. My life is getting better and it's all because of our Savior's love and help. He really is real.
ReplyDeleteThe last comment was from me--Mom--not Dad.
ReplyDeleteCami, I love reading posts from you because you are going through such similar things I did with young children and all the waves of emotion are coming back as I read. It is so great that you can recognize the Lord's hand in the tender mercies you are receiving. That is a special spiritual gift that you possess. I love that you love where you live and your surroundings. That is HUGE. You are a key component to your family's happiness and the fact that you are happy is awesome and your family will benefit from it greatly. Thank you for sharing such a sweet entry with us. And mom, I am so glad that you are seeing the brighter light now at the end of the tunnel and feeling God's Love throughout. I am also so glad that you made sure we knew that dad was not calling himself Ann Stokes. ;) I love you all!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely love that song. It must be a favorite new song because I think it has been in a couple other primary programs. I just never get sick of it. I get the chills every time I hear the primary children singing it even if I am in the Relief Society and just hearing it through the hall.
ReplyDeleteIt is so amazing to think of everything Heavenly Father blesses us with. The main thing I have been noticing since I have been a mother is just when I am about to break then something nice will happen. When the kids are driving me crazy and I am about to freak out, Bennett will come up and give me a kiss or if I have been waking up with the kids every night for 2 weeks and I just need a little sleep, I will notice that I will have just one night when I can sleep 5 hours straight. I love recognizing these little things and feeling loved by my Heavenly Father because of it.
That is so wonderful! This post strengthened me and gave me hope.
ReplyDelete